Find Your Why

This thought occurs to me everytime I watch somebody give up on their health and fitness goal. I know what it feels like to want something and then give up because you feel like you'll never make it. It seems like such a simple concept; find a goal, make a plan, work hard. Sadly, it's never that easy and so many people walk away after a short time. Is it because the goal was bad? Maybe it wasn't the right time? I know what you're thinking...this is about goals and goal setting for success, right? WRONG!. Everybody writes about goal setting and how it is essential to success. They write that goals should be small and incremental. Goals should be in arenas we can control. We all know that. After years of experience with making and missing goals I've found that goals are only a small part of the answer. Sure, I believe goals are good and are an essential part of the process, but no matter how carefully selected the goal and detailed the plan of action, a person will fail to achieve without one crucial piece. The bigger part to success, the part that keeps us going towards our goal is the WHY. I've written goals before, SMART goals and they got me nowhere, not because they were bad goals or the steps were wrong, but because the motivation was lacking. I can tell you the goal, the steps I took, and some excuse for why I failed, but that doesn't help get to the real issue. The real issue is what my failures taught me so I can help you find success. Right before someone gives up on a health goal, you can see it. They look depressed. They're asking for help. They can't seem to find motivation, won't train, and stray off their nutrition plan more frequently. I want to shake that person before they quit, to let them know if they just hold on and do a quick re-evaluation it can save them years of wondering "what if?" I want to tell them to train with me, to just take a chance, for two months, with me, and find out what they can really do. Sometimes it's something simple that you don't see when you're on the inside. The difference between most successes and failures in my experience has been finding the right reason to chase the goal through the good times and the bad. Most people I have worked with have their goal in mind. The statement of goal tends to be easy to come by; some goals are outrageous, some are realistic, and some are so small it is near impossible to fail, but they are goals nonetheless. However, when I ask the client why they want to accomplish the goal, it's a lot harder to get a real answer. I've heard a lot of reasons why they think they want to do it, but when the answer is shallow or the body language says something different, I understand why they're close to quitting. The hardest thing to do is find that reason why, but once you have that reason, it is never so hard to motivate yourself again. You can think I'm off base, but I've coached college athletes for nine years. Nine years of hearing "because I'm good at it" or "I love the game" or "I want to be great" and other variations of what they think their parents or I want to hear and very little reason to go through the battles and long days when they just don't want to do it. I've seen so many "great high school athletes" wash out after a challenge to their ego or a threat to their "free time." The crazy thing is, there's little difference between the college athlete and somebody chasing a fitness goal. For the health and fitness individual, it may be even tougher to find motivation; they face challenges without immediate feedback, challenges the ego, and disruption to the comfortable complacency they've been living in. When things are the hardest, that's when you need to have that why in your back pocket. Everybody has a WHY and for you, there is a why in there too. Sometimes it takes a little quiet reflection and a little soul searching, sometimes it takes an outsider to bounce ideas off of, but, once you remove all the bs and really think about why you want to accomplish the goal, you'll have the reason to push harder, fight the challenges, and a little extra kick to get it done... and if you don't, let me know, because I'm here and I want to see people succeed. Til next time... breath deep, squeeze tight, and keep fighting.